first draft annotating scholarly

Jessica deSousa
April 15, 2009
Annotating a Scholarly Article



Supiano, Beckie. “Student Aid is up, but the rise in College Costs Outpaces Family
Incomes.” The Chronicle of Higher Education 55.11 (2008). N/A. Academic Onefile. Web. 15 April 2009.

In this article, the author compares the rise in the cost of attending college to the decline in family income. She notes tuition and fees rose between 4.5% and 6.5%. Due to the rise in the cost of college, the total grant aid per student and total federal loans per student grew about 5.5%. The number of Pell Grant recipients held steady for two years at 5.2 million. That number has grown to about 5.4 million in 2007-08. As mentioned in the article, nest year’s student aid report will reflect the impact of tightened criteria for borrowing money. Approximately 60% of graduates have debt from undergraduate studies. The average total for those students is $22,700. Although student debt is a huge concern, not every student borrows money for college.
In-state tuition and fees at a public four year college increased 6.4%. In dollar amounts, instate fees rose $394 and out of state fees rose $866. Private four year institutions had an increase of 5.9%. In dollar amounts, tuition and fees rose $1,398. Over a thirty year period (1977-79 to 2007-08), the rise in family income is as follows:

20% of the poorest family = $463
20% of the middle family = $11,275
5% of the wealthiest family = $146,650

Over that same period of time, tuition and fees grew an average of about $1,300 in four year colleges and $15,000 at private four year colleges. The increase in the cost of college and the increase in family income are not relevant. The cost of college is increasing more rapidly then the family income. This increase in price, is making it more difficult for students to attend college.

I believe this article is very credible. Although by reading this article, I don’t learn much about the author she is very informative. The audience of the article is college bound students. She quotes facts from the College Board, the Consumer Price Index, and other legitimately important cites. The article is not very extensive; however it is long enough to portray her point. It explains in detail the rise and increases of various prices and she shows the figures in percentages and dollar amounts. The article was recently published and all the figures are recent and within the latest school year. The journal in which the essay appears, is also very credible and was published recently

Proposal Essay

Jessica deSousa
April 1, 2009


Proposal Essay: Class Scheduling


The semester is almost over and soon we will have to register for next semester’s classes. This process can be very stressful due to the lack of flexibility in the classes offered. Being a full time student and a full time employee, trying to balance as many classes as possible with work and still make the most of my time, is very difficult. I try to schedule as many classes as possible in the morning without too long of a break in between. By doing so, I would get all my classes and studying completes in the morning and have time available at night for work. However, last semester I found myself with two hour breaks in-between my classes three days a week. There aren’t many other things to do around campus in that time frame so I don’t find the two hour break very useful. This semester, I was able to schedule my classes with only an hour break, this break allows me to do some extra studying but often I find this time to be a waste. I would rather fill in that time with another class but that is impossible with the classes offered. Trying to balance school and work is hard enough for a college student without having to follow a tight class schedule.

There are not many students who don’t have a part or full time job so I assume this is a problem for other students as well. I decided to research this issue and ask a few students around campus how they felt about the issue and many of the students completely agreed with my argument. I found most of the people o questioned had hour long breaks if not longer that they felt weren’t very useful also. After hearing the opinion of current students, I decided to ask some alumni to get their opinion on the issue. One former student, Vanessa Machado who graduated in 2006, informed me that this is not a recent issue or one that the school and really control. “No matter what school you attend, there is going to be some part of your schedule that won’t quite fit,” she responded.
Most students are only taking three or four classes a semester not because of the difficulty, but due to the scheduling. This issue can not be easily fixed, but I think with a little more effort from the school, teachers, and students. I think the classes offered should be scattered between different days and times. When I register for my classes, I would find myself taking a math, English and language class, but they were all taught at the same time. There was no way I could take all three one semester. I think if they added one more class a day fro each subject, registering for classes would be so much easier. For example, the school could offer a math class at maybe 8 am, 10 am, and 12 noon. Then an English class at maybe 7 am, 9 am, and 11 am. In between, they could offer another class, such as a language, at maybe 12 am, 12 noon or 1 pm. This offers the students more choices for registering for classes.

Every project has its ups and downs. However I feel this will only better the school. There are no major costs to adding more classes to the schedule. The only cost to the school would be paying the instructors to teach one more class a day or maybe just three more classes a week. The cost of paying the teachers will be paid back to the school through tuition and other fees. When students register for more classes the more they pay. In the long run, if students are able to take more classes each semester that’s more money paid to the school.
I think this should be considered and hopefully there is a way to make registering for classes less stressful on students. As college students, we have a lot to worry about other than scheduling our classes. I hope to see a change in the classes offered soon for my own benefit and the benefit of other students.


POST WRITE:

1. How do you feel about the paper so far? Please explain and offer evidence from the work.
I think my paper is going well. I have meat the requirements in the rubric such as the cost of the project. Also, I have added a clear solution that will help. I researched the issue and received opinions from other students as well. This is only a second draft, but I feel my paper is very good.


2. What shape do you think it's in? Please explain and offer evidence?
My paper is in good shape. Again, this is not the final copy but I am very confident with my writing. I think it was very well written and I notice a very significant difference from my rough draft to this second draft.


3. What remains to be done? Please be precise.

I think all that remains to be done with my paper, is revising. I need to go back through and edit for grammar and misspellings.


4. What questions do you have for readers about the piece?

Do you think my solution for the problem is reasonable?
Are there any other costs to my solution I may not have realized?
Do you find yourself with the same issue I wrote about when registering for your classes ?